Knowledge extravaganza part one: JOY

I knew there was a good reason God gave me this desire to go to Colorado: He had stuff to teach me that He could only teach me there. Seriously, there have been things I've been struggling with for MONTHS that I've finally let go of and laid at His feet. There have been so many things I've heard before that haven't truly clicked until I heard them at Snowridge. And the cool part is, it's not stopping. He's building on more and more and sometimes I feel like my brain is going to explode and my heart is going to burst but I LOVE IT! He is good. Even if He has to break my legs to make me lie down in green pastures, He is good.

So, there are three parts to this knowledge extravaganza: Joy, Hope, and Grace. These words have changed their meanings for me. I hope I explain what I've learned well enough and God reveals something new to you too :)

This is what I think of when I think of Joy:

For you shall go out in

JOY

and be led forth in peace.

The mountains before you shall

break forth into singing,

and all the trees of the field

shall clap their hands.

Isaiah 55:12

What the heck?? That is the coolest thing I have ever read. Mountains are singing and trees are clapping their hands. Why? Because they are filled with this unexplainable JOY that comes from their CREATOR. That's the kind of Joy that He wants me to have too.

I didn't believe that for the longest time. I thought the inescapable sadness I felt so often was my fault. I felt shame in my sense of hopelessness. I didn't think I deserved Joy because I couldn't find it on my own. God is more than willing to play the role of Superman and fly me out of that pit, but man, He wants more for me. And I think He spoke to me this summer. I was surrounded by darkness and He whispered ask for my Joy. So I did. I prayed for something I had never given a second thought to. Joy. Awhile ago, I think the lie was planted in my head that finding Joy was my responsibility. That if I wasn't constantly overflowing with pure Joy all the time, I was doing something wrong. DUMB. My Joy comes from Him, and He is glad to pour it over me.

I read this book I found in Ute lodge (where all the girls on project stayed. Also known as Uterus lodge...) called The Furious Longing of God and something the author, Brennan Manning, suggests doing is holding out your palms, closing your eyes and saying "Abba, I belong to you." I think that's beautiful. And I guess it's my way of saying "God I need you right now. I need to be reminded that you love me, that you created me for good works and you are leading me to walk in them. LORD, fill me with the Joy that comes from knowing these things. Put the biggest smile on my face because I belong to you." I say that simple phrase, and everything changes. The battle that's raging in my heart comes to a hault because with those words, the enemy FLEES. Joy is powerful stuff.

There's a little snippet for ya. Forrealsies, don't be afraid to ask for Joy.

Here's a random picture of a freakin cool Colorado rainbow.
Papa's a SWEET painter.

[Abba, I belong to YOU]

BAMBI.

You know what I think is really super cool? When God answers silly little prayers that are just kind of said in passing. To him, I don't think they're silly at all. I think he loves that we ask him for things. My last blog was pretty much about this same kind of thing: God loves to wow us. So about a week ago (and this was also inspired by the book Captivating) I was like God, it would be awesome if you showed me something really cool in your creation before I leave. And a part of me felt kind of guilty for asking that. Like I need more than what he's already done for me? But I'm starting to realize that thinking like that is pretty twisted. He is rich in mercy and abounding in love. RICH and ABOUNDING. His blessings are neverending! And when we go to him and ask him to show up in big ways and small, he is glorified.

So, today God showed me something pretty spectacular. It was a baby deer. She was born under the porch of one of the cabins and her mom was standing by waiting for her to take her first steps. Actually, the baby was kind of stuck under the steps and unable to get up on her own, so Judy (a wonderful lady who partially owns the camp / cooks / is our resident Grandma this summer) went over and picked up the teensy little baby and moved her out from under the steps. She was still all slimy from being born! Judy said she was about 20 minutes old. It was SO COOL. And it was the most adorable thing I have ever seen.

Thanks Papa :)