I've had some interesting thoughts today.
1) Do other people daydream as much as I do? And these are hardcore daydreams. I have conversations with people. In detailed settings. I plan out everything I would say to someone, except, of course I'd probably never be brave enough to actually execute them. And you know, I think that's the beauty of daydreams honestly. I am able to let out my feelings, without making any big potential mistakes. As long as the daydreams don't completely take over my mind so that I turn into a zombie, what's the big deal right? But I still think I may be alone on this one sometimes.
2) Are the things I do throughout the day things that I actually enjoy doing, or am I trying to distract myself? I discovered a number of time-wasting websites recently (I had to replace facebook somehow) and of course, there's always Gilmore Girls. Am I so concentrated on staying busy because I don't want to be bored? Or because I don't want to dwell on unpleasant things? There's a point nearly every day where I just become completely overwhelmed with...sadness, I guess is the right word. But if I'm focusing on homework or talking to my friends or doing something stupid and distracting, I'm not feeling sad. I'm not sure if this is healthy or not.
3) What does it mean to be unafraid of falling in love? I was discussing with a dear friend (she shall remain anonymous) that you can't be afraid of the consequences of falling in love. And you can't expect things to end with broken hearts because that's so completely pessimistic and poisonous. Love is scary and it involves a degree of faith, and it can be really really tough. But if you're not willing to take the chance, then that's basically saying that love isn't worth it. And I refuse to believe that. Love is always worth the pain and the heartache and the trouble and the scariness because, in the end, love is the greatest thing in the entire world.
So, there you have it.
(The title of this post comes from Some Hearts by Carrie Underwood)
I daydream like that sometimes too. It's usually right before I fall asleep. I am glad that you still think that love is the greatest thing in the world. You are an inspiration to us all!
ReplyDelete1. i daydream like it's my damn job. also, sometimes when i'm alone in my room a talk to the mirror like it's a person. i practice these elaborate things i will say, but of course, i wont say them.
ReplyDelete2. i think you do enjoy the things you have in life. Gilmore Girls has become a part of my life and i love it! i think running and writing here and in your journal are very good uses of your time. also, skyping with me and doing yoga half naked [creepy smile]. it's all about balance and making yourself happy and no one else. find some hobbies and stick to them.
3. i think one important thing is to love yourself first, then others. if you can't love yourself and who you have become, then how can you show others love? it's not easy loving someone when you are unsure about yourself. trust me, i have some current experience. just trust that God will show you where love is and how love is. a.k.a. me! jk. but seriously, you know i'm here always and forever.
i luhh you boo
1. i was worried that my english composition teacher was going to make me read my essay out loud in class today, and while i was sitting in class worrying i had a long and complete daydream sequence about me reading it aloud and how i would say it, what words i would stumble over, the chubby kid next to me would sneeze, etc etc. so you're not alone.
ReplyDelete2. i've never seen anyone genuinely enjoy gilmore girls as much as you, dear :) although i certainly love it myself! you should just do what makes you feel happy with yourself.
3. i love you! God loves you! lindsey loves you! but in all seriousness, love does hurts. for a long time. but its totally worth it.
you guys are the best :)
ReplyDelete1. [creepy smile]
ReplyDelete2. buggle!
3. 8
4. ullis
ReplyDelete