My heart is torn.

I've never had an inkling to hear my dad yell curse words, but right now, I think that's the only way to describe how I'm feeling. My father flips over tables for Hoosier basketball. He doesn't leave the house (or lounge around the house) without wearing at least one article of IU clothing. If you try to ask a question, make a statement, or even say say something nice to him while IU is playing, be prepared to get slapped and/or thrown out the front door. My family can attest to this, I am SO not joking.

So, here I find myself, in my dorm room, all alone, bored out of my mind, watching the Purdue vs. IU basketball game, and I miss my daddy. 4.8 seconds left and I can picture him on the edge of the couch cushion, eyes ablaze, jaws clenched, mesmerized. "Foul him!" "Get back on defense!" "What the #$%^!" What a beautiful picture of an American sports fan.

Also as I sit here, I can't picture being a [deep breath] Boilermaker. I think my baby blanket was cream and crimson, and I distinctly remember being dressed in an IU sweatshirt as a toddler. I've known the players' names every season, I know that this is a "rebuilding year", and I know that Mike Davis was the worst coach to ever walk the earth. I've defended IU's honor countless times, and I love sharing that bound with my dad.

But I plan to go to Purdue next year...my heart is torn.

Can I be a neutral fan? Is that allowed?

Well, here's hoping my father doesn't disown me.